A thing or two about being baby hungry.
4/30/2013
Did you know that it's MAY tomorrow? How the heck did that happen?!
I love it, to tell you the truth. May is always welcome in our house.
So let's talk for a minute about baby hunger. Isn't that a funny thing? I went through a phase in college when I told everyone that I was "baby hungry". I don't want to get married, I would say, just have a baby! Because every baby that passed me by made me swoon. I was a tad ridiculous back then I guess, but also, I have some sort of motherly passion that burns inside of me like one of those trick candles that mean parents put on their kids birthday cakes so they can record a video and send it to AFV.
Then, someoddyearslater, I really had a baby. Kind of on accident but in a total act of fate, we had ourselves the greatest thing we have ever made before. He was perfect and sweet and, although he is much more work nowdays, he is still perfect and sweet and will always be that way in my eyes. Except when he's a stubborn teenager and I'm told that I won't think he is perfect and sweet for a little while. For now, though, he is perfect and we are nothing but in love with that kid.
But.
Why is there always a but?
Having a baby, really having one of your very own, it sure is an eye opening experience. One of those, let's let reality slap us in the face kind of experiences. Lots of work, lots of responsibility, lots of tears, lots of happiness, lots of emotions you didn't know existed, lots of no sleep, lots of staying awake, even more not sleeping and staying awake...that kind of thing. It's easy to be baby hungry when you've never had a baby before. That's my theory. And then you go through the most miserable labor and recovery straight from your nightmares, the kind that lasts for days and breaks your tailbone, and you tell yourself that one baby is plenty enough, thank you very much! Never again, you declare! And husband raises his fist to the sky and says, whatever my wife wants she gets! One baby it is! And a sweet new pair of Jimmy Choos!
Since I've had little dude, even though he has been nothing but a blessing to us, it has been easier to keep a sane and rational head on. This is a big deal because 'sane' and 'rational' are both things I have never been before. Nowdays, when I see a sweet little baby or hear of a friend who is pregnant and that trick candle flickers, it's much easier to blow it out. Much easier.
Monday I was planning on watching a friend's little gal who is about 4 months old. I was excited to have a sweet little squiggly roly poly around the house to keep us company. Sunday night just before bed I braved the storage room (which is a big deal, if you saw my storage room) to fish out the boppy and the baby swing. I haven't seen those lovelies since mister J was a wee lad, and I tell you what, I was completley unprepared for the level of excitement that would hit me when I first saw that swing! Picture a giddy little girl on Christmas morning. I'll admit, it was pretty pathetic.
I brought the swing out and made the hubs get out of bed in his underwear to come look! He rolled his eyes, that's what he did, but are we really surprised?
As I laid in bed that night I couldn't help but be confused as to why that darn swing, finding it in the storage room and setting it up in the living room like it belonged there as much as the couch it stood next to, had made me so super happy. I can't be positive, but I think it was the nostalgic memories that made me giddy. The thought that, oh yeah! We used to have a baby that could fit in this swing! A baby with chubby leg rolls that blew spit bubbles and giggled and slept and let me hold him all day long!
Anyway, I guess this all comes up because not a week goes by lately without someone asking me when I'm going to have another baby. They think I just must be dying to get one of those! A baby! And it's understandable, I'd ask too if I were them. But do you want to know a secret? You can be baby hungry but not want a baby right now. You can love babies while the timing can be not quite right yet. That happens sometimes. My recently found level-headedness told me that.
And not just baby hunger, but there are maybe ten thousand other factors to throw in the mix. I know that some people want big families, some people want small families, some people don't want kids at all...and that doesn't make one or the other wrong. It's all kind of personal and spiritual and thank goodness we don't all have to have the exact same number of kids, or we would all be living in China! You know what I mean?
But what it all comes down to is this: if you ask me when I will be bringing another baby into this world, I will tell you the same thing as I tell everyone else: somewhere between nine months and never. That's when we will have another baby.
That's just a rough estimate, the kind of estimate that really keeps people wondering. I like to keep people wondering. It's fun.
PS this post was not directed to Melissa or Nicole, both of who have asked me recently. You two can ask all you want. In fact, if you come to my house and bring chocolate cake, I will put you on the list of my first 10 people to tell next time I'm preggers. But seriously, don't forget the chocolate cake or the deal is off.
PSS I wish this level-headedness would talk to me about buying things I want but don't need. That would be nice. But if I had to choose one or the other, I guess a closet full of clothes is better then 12 kids? I don't know anymore.
PPS On a serious note. I know that there are some women out there who would kill to have a baby, and that this can be a sensitive subject. Posts like these are lighthearted and fun, but don't misjudge them for me being ignorant and oblivious. I love all and never mean to offend!
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Meg! love you! and I get it...I am baby hungry - but know my little family of four (well 5 if you can't the furry kid) is complete! but I tell you, I think about having another baby and get misty eyed when I remember the smells, and the littleness - but they are just thoughts and memories... and I am ok with that! BUT (and theres the but) when or if you have your next baby, you can bet your little behind I will be over there everyday living vicariously!!
ReplyDeleteWe are just wired to want those little babies huh?! Even when we know our family is complete! Being a woman is weird. And I'll be HAPPY to let you live vicariously through me! Wahoo!! :)
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